The premier site for all information relating to MAMBA, the Middle-Aged Men's Basketball Association. Featuring individual/team stats, online voting, game summaries, and injury reports.
Phil B, one of Mamba's greatest players, suffered an injury so severe that Louis K. had to drive him to the emergency room. Late in the first half Phil reached for a loose ball and either dislocated or broke his finger.
His pain was obvious and it quickly became clear that no one really had a plan in the case of a Mamba injury. Players began shouting out their limited medical knowledge -
"walk it off" "ice it" "drink a lot of water" "keep it elevated" "pull it" "play through it"
Fortunately, Phil ignored all of this advice and went to the emergency room instead. I'll admit it, the finger did look pretty bad, but hopefully doctors can straighten it out.
Phil was a good man, a man of solid values and a passion for nature. He enjoyed dancing in the woods, making slow motionless love, and going for long nude walks on the beach. He liked to play the fiddle and make miniature cities out of clay. He will be missed and the game will not be the same without Mamba's leading scorer. Return soon, Phil.
On a side note, Louis was having the best game of his career. 30 minutes into the game Louis had already hit at least four 3s. You could argue that Phil's injury was an act of total and complete selfishness, in that it pulled Louis from probably the finest performance of his life. Did Phil purposefully dislocate his finger just to steal the spotlight from Louis? Could this be Mamba's first conspiracy theory??????
After 3 league games I compiled league averages in all major categories. This is a good opportunity for you to match your numbers against the average and examine the strengths and weaknesses of your game. very valuable information.
his birth name is Nicholas, but the world knows him as The Italian. He bears two proud honors - Hairiest MAMBA player and Highest FG% this series (37.3%). but what do we really know about this mysterious person? is he man or is he beast? perhaps this Q&A will reveal the creature behind the myth:
1. how italian are you on a scale of 1-10 (10 being undoubtedly italian)?
dieci… senza dubbio
2. while you are in the act of shooting, are you thinking about italian food? if so, which kind of italian food?
Descrivo l'orlo fatto dai collegamenti della salsiccia calda, il netto….i fili dello speghetti e la pallacanestro è una sfera di riso siciliana gigante
3. the Knicks drafted an italian last year. does this make you feel good?
Ha luogo circa tempo che i NBA riconoscono il calibro del giocatore Italia devono offrire. Viva Danilo!!
4. how long does it take you to grow a full beard?
due settimane
5. if you could be any italian meat, which italian meat would you be?
Sopressada caldo - relativo il re dei salami italiani
6. there are 3 italians in Mamba. should there be more?
Penso che tre siano solo fini - è un fatto ben noto che sudiamo l'olio di oliva vergine supplementare - altri italiani della sgocciolatura abbiano reso la corte unplayable.
7. how would your game be different if the basketball was a large mozzarella ball?
come esso quando comunicate sporco con me.
8. this season you have the league's highest FG% with 37.3%. how much of this do you attribute to you being italian?
Tutto l'esso!!
9. you are averaging 17 points this season yet your italian teammate, hot shot koster, is only averaging 7 ppg. why is one italian scoring a lot and another italian scoring a little?
Il colpo caldo sta ottenendo appena riscaldato. Gioco seguente sta andando illuminare in su il bordo del segno. Noi italiani attacchiamo insieme.
10. do you like joe pesci?
".....Do I look like a clown to you? ...... How the F*CK am I funny!!?"
Dovete essere controllato per vedere se c'è un battito cardiaco se non gradite questo!
the irishman has finally done it! after 7 games and a league leading 154 rebounds, the red haired leprauchaun has claimed his first Black Mamba Snake award. Embrace this achievement, Patrick, and celebrate your victory with a delicious irish dinner - boiled potatoes, boiled carrots, and boiled cabbage! yum!
on a side note, i forgot to mention that b-flo scored a double double in the last game. That leaves only one player yet to reach the milestone - WD-40 fingers a.k.a PAM hands.
it's been awhile, so i thought i'd put together a little montage to celebrate the new gym. i really didn't have the time to pick out the best plays, but these are pretty cool. watch phil get beat down low again and again and again and again. he appears lost and confused, like a little bird who's fallen out of his nest. - neal
phil is more than deserving of this week's Step It Up, Bitch award. his shot was like a reoccuring nightmare. i felt physically ill watching his game. but i simply can not hand him the award, simply because he's coming off two consecutive MVP awards. consider it a free pass.
this week's award goes to me. my numbers aren't terrible, but i've been at a steady decline in FG% and rebounds over the past few games. and watching me miss wide open layups made me want to ban myself from basketball forever. i asked myself, "how can this person who went out and bought new sneakers, new shorts, new knee pads.....how can he be so bad?" i was like a little boy who decided to dress up like LeBron James for halloween. this week i wear the crown.
i gotta hand it to the Heroes....they pulled it together and won a game that they owned from the start. leave it to the irishman to play his best game on the eve of St. Patrick's Day. one steal shy of a triple double...it almost seems pointless to vote for best player. patrick should have his first Black Mamba award. he's also broken the single game record for most steals in a game.
the Heroes adjusted the Horsemen's run and gun style, picked off the deep passes, forced turnovers, and dictated the game with consistency. every player contributed on offense. they moved the ball, they controlled the tempo. they hit the big shot when it counted. they are winners in every sense.
a few highlights - dan w. had his best single game FG% with 38.5% and missed a double/double by 1 rebound. kevin had his highest career steal total with 5. the italian continued his double double streak (17 pts/14 rebounds) and had a career high with 5 assists. hot shot had his highest offensive rebound total with 4.
speaking of hot shot.......i knew that putting his face on the body of richard simmons was going to come back and bite me on the ass. sealing the game with a 3....there's no better revenge. so as a reward to you, hot shot, i give you this gift. my face on billy joel's body. enjoy!
sing us a song, you're the piano man!
the horsemen came out flat again and never really got in a groove. thai lightning slipped back into his old self and let every pass go right through his hands. i'm trying to think of an embarrassing nickname, but Margarine Hands really doesn't have a ring to it.
Dan Powers has turned into a quiet monster. he doesn't try any fancy shit and sticks with the high percentage shot. this one would've been a blowout without his game.
B-flo - you should be proud. you're no longer the owner of worst shot. that award goes to Margarine Hands, aka Oily Fingers.
game 4 is Monday. both sides have a lot to play for and a case can be made that this is the most crucial game of the series.....Horsemen win and victory is close enough to kiss. Heroes win and the momentum could be too strong to overcome.
Phil B, one of Mamba's greatest players, suffered an injury so severe that Louis K. had to drive him to the emergency room. Late in the first half Phil reached for a loose ball and either dislocated or broke his finger. 
